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About Digital Art / Artist starsandpolkadotsFemale/Unknown Group :iconthisfuckingcitysucks: ThisFuckingCitySucks
 
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trio 2015 by starsandpolkadots
trio 2015
Haven't drawn in two years... well, I have but... not really. :( Sketched the (ex) trio of derp a few weeks ago. They have changed (personality wise, look wise, ...), as have their relationships with each other (and other peeps too). Too lazy to go into detail... my TCS tumblr still exists (as do all my peeps!) so you might want to hit up that one for more info. :D

I want to draw more but I'm not sure if I'm gonna go through with it. Still fighting life and such. SIGH.
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... I got fired last Wednesday. So they did not only suck a big chunk of life out of me, they also gave me the final punch in the guts. This nagging feeling of having failed HARD, guh. I wasn't cut out for the position. For the job in general. I know it's not the end of the world but I feel like shit anyway. I have to go job hunting again. Love that SO MUCH, you have no idea.

For now, though... rest. I really need some rest. I'm not sad to leave the place, not at all. The first second after my ex-boss broke the news to me I just felt relief. Then panic. Relief first, tho. That has to mean something, right? I don't miss them, unlike the agency where I did my second internship. I still miss them like whoa.

I feel... better, actually. Not only relieved but better. No more stomach aches in the morning. No more panic attacks before leaving the flat. I experience valid feelings again. Sadness, joy, anger... mostly sadness and anger these days but oy, FEELINGS. Just a few clouds left in my brain, yay! I must've looked and acted like a zombie, according to the BF, friends and family. Like, two weeks ago, I got terribly drunk at my brother's b-day party and apparently I couldn't stop crying in my mom's arms, crying out stuff like "I can't do this anymore, I just can't, I won't make it..." I don't remember anything of that myself (luckily). Mom told me last weekend, after they dumped me. She had tears in her eyes and I got some serious chills when she said "I just couldn't believe that this crying mess in my arms was once my daughter. My tough, talented, amazing and beautiful daughter. I want my daughter back!" ... ouch.


So much ouch. But you know what!?


She will get her daughter back. BF will get his girl back. My friends will get their friend back.

This is not a threat.

It's a promise. :D
Take care, guys. :heart:
Yeah I know.

I pretty much vanished. Whoops. Life and other shit smacked me right from behind. I've been more or less active on my tumblr but not that much either. Dunno if I'll ever be as active again as I used to be. I wanna try and do some more art because I realized that I do not only miss it; I also NEED it. Desperately.

I also miss my characters and creating their lives and stories. They changed a bit in my mind, I can't wait to let them live again. :D

My own life's pretty messy atm. I moved in with the BF in April, lived a happy, fairly ordinary life until the end of July when I fell right back into depression, because of job stuff, mostly. I need to change some things and doing more art will be one of them. Looking for a new job some time next year might be another. I'll see about that, though.

I'm trying to get better. I already am because for the first time while battling my own mind, I try not to shut in. It helps a great deal, actually. I go for walks after work, I go shopping, sometimes I have dinner out on my own, I talk to friends… I feel quite ok. I try to give as much as possible as well. Making others feel good is a great thing. It helps a lot.

Take care, you guys! See you soon! :heart:

P.S: I deleted all my messages/deviations here. Couldn't keep up with them, in no way. If there is/was anything you desperately wanted me to see/read, feel free to write/note me again! :heart:
... I got fired last Wednesday. So they did not only suck a big chunk of life out of me, they also gave me the final punch in the guts. This nagging feeling of having failed HARD, guh. I wasn't cut out for the position. For the job in general. I know it's not the end of the world but I feel like shit anyway. I have to go job hunting again. Love that SO MUCH, you have no idea.

For now, though... rest. I really need some rest. I'm not sad to leave the place, not at all. The first second after my ex-boss broke the news to me I just felt relief. Then panic. Relief first, tho. That has to mean something, right? I don't miss them, unlike the agency where I did my second internship. I still miss them like whoa.

I feel... better, actually. Not only relieved but better. No more stomach aches in the morning. No more panic attacks before leaving the flat. I experience valid feelings again. Sadness, joy, anger... mostly sadness and anger these days but oy, FEELINGS. Just a few clouds left in my brain, yay! I must've looked and acted like a zombie, according to the BF, friends and family. Like, two weeks ago, I got terribly drunk at my brother's b-day party and apparently I couldn't stop crying in my mom's arms, crying out stuff like "I can't do this anymore, I just can't, I won't make it..." I don't remember anything of that myself (luckily). Mom told me last weekend, after they dumped me. She had tears in her eyes and I got some serious chills when she said "I just couldn't believe that this crying mess in my arms was once my daughter. My tough, talented, amazing and beautiful daughter. I want my daughter back!" ... ouch.


So much ouch. But you know what!?


She will get her daughter back. BF will get his girl back. My friends will get their friend back.

This is not a threat.

It's a promise. :D
Take care, guys. :heart:

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starsandpolkadots's Profile Picture
starsandpolkadots

Artist | Digital Art
Hi there! :)

I have put together some FAQ. Please read them before asking anything! :) starsandpolkadots.deviantart.c…

Some quick notes:
* I DON'T DO REQUESTS! STOP ASKING ME!
* Art trades are FRIENDS ONLY, if anything at all. I just don't have the time for them right now.

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:iconplcthecd:
PLCTheCd Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
I shall drink to your health on your birthday!

:beer::drunk::iconbudweiserplz::iconwineplz::iconpintplz::iconwhiskeyplz::iconmargaritaplz::iconjackdanielsplz::iconchampagneplz::iconmartiniplz::iconheinekenplz:::iconrumplz::icondrunkplz:
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:icongryffgirl:
Gryffgirl Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2016
Happy birthday! :iconrainbowbummiecakeplz:
Reply
:iconjuliafliess:
juliafliess Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2016  Student Filmographer
Happy Birthday!!
Reply
:icondyel75:
Dyel75 Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2016  Student Traditional Artist
:party::party:HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!:party::party::cake:
I Hope You Have a Very Nice Day!!!!:blowkiss:
Best Wishes And Greetings from Brazil!!!:hug:
Reply
:iconmairelyn:
Mairelyn Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
:iconcolorfulsparklesplz: :iconblue-hplz: :iconblue-aplz: :iconblue-pplz: :iconblue-pplz: :iconblue-yplz: 

:iconblue-bplz: :iconblue-iplz: :iconblue-rplz: :iconblue-tplz: :iconblue-hplz: :iconblue-dplz: :iconblue-aplz::iconblue-yplz: :iconcolorfulsparklesplz:

:iconsparklyplz: :iconsparklyplz: :iconsparklyplz: :iconsparklyplz: 



:iconcakeplz11::iconcakeplz12::iconcakeplz13:
:iconcakeplz14::iconcakeplz15::iconcakeplz16:
:iconcakeplz17::iconcakeplz18::iconcakeplz19:


:iconpinkcakeplz: :iconcakecookieplz: :party: :cake: :iconcakepinkplz: 

:iconrainbowbummiecakeplz: :iconfloatingstarplz: 

:iconrainbowwaveplz1::iconrainbowwaveplz2::iconrainbowwaveplz3: :iconcheerplz: 



Hope you have a Wonderful Amazing Day Today! :icongwompplz:
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:iconallieg06:
AllieG06 Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
MenInASuitcase Fella Heart Kiss (Love) 
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:iconmoodypug:
MoodyPug Featured By Owner Oct 13, 2015
:heart:!
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:iconstarsandpolkadots:
starsandpolkadots Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2015   Digital Artist
:heart:!!
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:iconmoodypug:
MoodyPug Featured By Owner Oct 17, 2015
THANK YOU FOR WATCHING ME :heart:

Also, I want to say that I think you're super rad and the bad times won't always be bad. SO KEEP YOUR CHIN UP, OKAY?
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:iconplcthecd:
PLCTheCd Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
Happy Birthday! :party::iconcakeplz::w00t:

I shall drink to your health! :iconpintplz::beer::iconbudweiserplz::iconwineplz::iconrumplz::iconjackdanielsplz::iconwhiskeyplz::icontequilaplz::iconmargaritaplz::iconmartiniplz::drunk::icondrunkplz:
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:iconmairelyn:
Mairelyn Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
HAPPY BIRTHDAY :cake: 
Reply
:icondyel75:
Dyel75 Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2015  Student Traditional Artist
:party::party:HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!:party::party::cake:
I Hope You Have a Very Nice Day!!!:blowkiss:
Best Wishes And Greetings From Brazil!!!:hug:
P.S.:I Follow You On tumblr,Too!!
Reply
:icongrizzly-bear-joe101:
Grizzly-Bear-Joe101 Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Happy birthday.
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:iconmariannanight:
MariannaNight Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Happy Birthday! Hope you have a wonderful day!
Reply
:iconvioletky:
VioletKy Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Happy Birthday!!! :party: :hug:
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:iconkaedegirl:
Kaedegirl Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I wish you a happy early birthday :) :heart:
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:iconursuladecay:
UrsulaDecay Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2014  Professional General Artist
Thank  you  for watching meeeee  ^  o ^   <3
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:iconstarsandpolkadots:
starsandpolkadots Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2014   Digital Artist
But of course! You have super fun artwork, the watch was a MUST! :D
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:icondennia:
dennia Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2014  Professional General Artist
Ow wow!! Thank you for watch me!! It means a lot! :hug:
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:iconmilliardpeacecraft:
MilliardPeacecraft Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2014
Tag, quality  deviant, you’re it! Quality doesn't mean that you have a lot of followers, or a lot of messages. It means that you’re nice to other people, and you deserve to be happy. If you get this message, someone is telling you that they love you as you are, and they don’t care how much followers you have. Send this to 10 deviants who deserve it. If you break the chain, nothing will happen. But it’s just good to let someone know that you love them! ~:heart:
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:iconvioletky:
VioletKy Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I must add you to my watchers couse your drawing style is absolutely amaizing!!! Congrats for the gallery!
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:iconstarsandpolkadots:
starsandpolkadots Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2014   Digital Artist
Thank you soo much! :D Your gallery is very neat as well! :heart:
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:iconvioletky:
VioletKy Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Happy that you like it ^_^And also your welcome! :hug:
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:iconbigassjay:
BigAssJay Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I like your skills!
Reply
:iconstarsandpolkadots:
starsandpolkadots Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2014   Digital Artist
Glad you do, thanks. :)
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